an “I” message consists of (1) how someone’s behavior makes you feel, (2) what the specific behavior is, and (3) the effect of the behavior.
The following three situations show a need for an “I” message.
1. Four of your employees share a single telephone line. You are aware that one of them, Harry R., is especially long-winded on the phone and talks for as long as 15 minutes. This prevents others from placing outgoing calls and ties up the line, preventing customers from getting through.
2. It is a requirement that waiters at the upscale restaurant you manage wear white shirts and ties. One waiter has been loosening his tie, dropping the knot about two inches, and unbuttoning his shirt collar.
3. Coffee breaks for your office staff are normally 15 minutes. When someone occasionally takes a few minutes longer, it’s not a big deal. Lately, however, one staff member has had three consecutive days when the break exceeded 20 minutes.
Write a hypothetical “I” message for each of the three situations.